1. |
SOLVE MY SADNESS
04:10
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And so I work myself and drain myself
And you're the reason why
I'd never hurt somebody, I've never even tried
But now I'll try, or else I'll die, and no one else will know I cried
'Cause I might go solve my sadness with a guy
What will you do about my sickness?
If it was yours, would you live with it?
Is it even called an illness if I know? I've been known
And is it wrong to disassociate?
My dignity could wash away
And is it wrong to get it on so I don't have to think at all?
It's the best part! It's my sad arc
ABC, what the world could do to me
If I let it go, if I let it show, let the feelings flow
Rock and roll, I fall asleep
And I like to imagine myself between your arms
Like it matters if I'm there, if I'm here or anywhere
In my dreams or my despair, you exist without a care
"I do, I do" I'll never say that to you
'Cause I know if I do, shop for new honeymoons
I'm hitched to the concept that my love is overrated, getting me onto a lifelong path of twos
Intimacy, as scary as it seems, is inflated by the internet
As what you get for being someone cool, maybe pretty too
Is it even called an sickness if I knew?
Is it even called an illness if it's only ever brewed?
If I'm gonna give it up and sell my dignity for rushes,
Then my crushes better understand I'm doomed
What will you do about my sickness?
If it was yours, would you live with it?
Is it even called an illness if I know? I've been known
And is it wrong to disassociate?
My dignity could wash away
And is it wrong to get it on so I don't have to think at all?
And so I work myself and drain myself
And you're the reason why
I'd never hurt somebody, I've never even tried
But now I'll try, or else I'll die, and no one else will know I cried
'Cause I might go solve my sadness with a guy
I'm hurting in abundance without every knowing why
The reason's pretty simple, but was never on my mind
I think that's fine, consider Y, because my ex just hit my line
Throw away your worth, let's sixty nine
Do it like you're running out time
Do it like you're the last people alive
It'll never make you happy, but it'll pass the time
Go and solve your sadness with a guy
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2. |
KID LIKE YOU
03:46
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I got microagressed on a Wednesday
I can barely keep up, baby replay
I don't know you, hope I don't have to,
Gonna ignore you, forget all about you
I got bullied on a casual Monday
I got pushed to the side in a gymnasium setting
You're so upsetting, who are you testing?
I'm just a kid, like you
(Just a kid, like you)
And it's crazy how much I deplore you
And really not you, its the memories
Oh, they haunt me, tease, tear, and taunt me
Constantly flaunting how uncool I can be
But that's really not me
Not since 2013
Not since Nat Geo magazines
Not since I started having dreams
(Since I started having dreams)
You were a kid, but who were you fooling?
Was it worth it being mean to be cool?
See, you didn't know that I was in shambles
Blow out the candles, take a look underneath
I can also learn to be mean
And that's exactly what I'll be
So long, and thanks for everything
So long and thanks for everything...
If I get micro-aggressed on a Wednesday
If I get bullied on a casual Monday
If my home life is an opera in decay
How do I prove that I'm just a kid like you?
If I get older and nothing much changes
How do I justify these phases?
I can't fathom how I got sadder
Older, way fatter
I wanted a childhood too
What am I suppoused to do?
Thinking of memories of you
I'm reminising on abuse
'Cause I was just a kid like you
I was just a kid like you
Never good enough for you
Just a kid, like you
Just a kid, like you
Na na na, I was a kid like you
I was a kid like you
Na na na, I was a kid like you
I was a kid like you
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3. |
BEGIN AGAIN
03:48
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(What if I'm holding on for way too long?
What if I beg my lover to stay?
And the things that go wrong are simply never my fault
So be kind to me so I can feel okay)
I traded honor away begging people to stay
So I can feel reassured once more
But people will change, and I guess I am the same
Grieving what I never had and what I lost
But girls don't cry, so that's not why I'm making rivers in my room
Can't sleep, can't dream, can't eat, can't be the daughter that you wish resembled you
I think about it and I'm happiest when you're crying too, but I don't wanna look like you
THERE WAS ALWAYS A WAY TO BRIGHTEN MY DAY
BUT YOU'LL NEVER FIND IT NOW THAT I'M GONE
SO BEGIN AGAIN, IF ONLY UNDER HER BREATH
THE PATH LAYS OUT FOR YOU, LET WORRY REST
THERE WAS ALWAYS A WAY TO KEEP ME AT BAY
BUT YOU WON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS, CAUSE I'M GONE
NOW BEGIN AGAIN, YOUR SOUL IS FREE, SO DO THE REST
BEGIN AGAIN, BEGIN AGAIN, BEGIN AGAIN
(Begin again)
What if I'm holding on for way too long?
How can I restart if everything's wrong?
Can I run away, or should I behave?
Compare my heartrate to a parade-type drum
So tell me why I can't seem to act right
Can't make up my mind if I want the spotlight
But if you look at me and see someone you wish you knew
Maybe I grew, maybe I started again
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4. |
SAY BYE GIRL!
03:36
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And the song keeps playing with a stereo sound
With the stellar level panning, left and right, all around
She never really made it rooted up from the ground
But having fun all with it honey, that's the purpose we found
Girl you've been deceived, gloomy gray looming clouds
You should walk away and free yourself from being so down
And I would love to take you, shine light on your ground
Say bye, girl! You deserve it! Be mine, sunshine I found
Baby, search and be found
Be mine, sunshine I found
Baby, search and be found
Be mine, sunshine I found
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5. |
CHOOSE XL
02:28
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6. |
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Ah, I stop myself from losing everything
Life and death and birth and all those little things
All the people that I've met have lost something
Life and death and kittens are promised, the misery all may bring
Maybe you haven't heard what this life is all about
Let it play all its tricks on you, leave you hanging there with doubts
What you want from me, I can't give
Go ask someone not struggling to live
Before you lose someone, or something
Ask yourself if it's worth it
Talk about stopping me
No, there's no stopping me
Rid the world of the things that are harming me
Said you could come with me
But you won't come with me
Without you life and death just keep haunting me
Do you ever lie awake wondering,
"Why am I alive and still sweltering?"
Manifesting fake, inhale, exhale, quake
Close your eyes, dream yourself in your better days
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7. |
IDENTITY CRISIS
03:39
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8. |
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Maybe I'm not wrong
You're just the only one
Who gets to see me doing what I love
Away from people hate to see me
Prosper better than you or anyone, except I never will
Because I'm way too scared to move on
I've been on a high since i saw you and I hope I don't come down
It seems like I might have a problem
What's the price to have a conscience? I may just let you down
I feel guilty, not out loud, but I do
I think about the fault I cause (It's for the sake of both of us)
I think that I will make it pause (It's for the sake of both of us)
And how I feel is not a must (It's for the sake of both of us)
I'll turn it off, I'll mute the lust (It's for the sake of both of us)
Some things happen so slowly
Some things happen slowly
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9. |
RECOVER
02:20
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10. |
THE THINGS ILL REGRET
01:49
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11. |
LOW
03:30
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I think that everything is kinda stupid
I cannot think of anything that's worth my precious time
No matter who surrounds me, I still know that I'm alone
The company I keep is in my mind
From lozenges to substances, nothing really heals me
I spend my time alone inside my room
The second that I have someone, I'm only full of fear
And it's telling me I'm never gonna grow
Do you believe in me? I bet you don't
Don't even know me, you don't even try to know
Do you acknowledge me? Mmm, barely so
I know there's nothing about me you wanna know
I wake up every day and try to balance out the failures
One or two or three can't be redeemed
And no matter all the effort I put in, it's like nothing ever changes
It feels like there is nothing in this world i have to yearn for
Yet I'm yearning all the time, so bad it hurts
I hope that I'm gone soon, I know nobody's gonna miss me
If you would, I don't believe you, I need proof
Because you came along and tore down everything that I was building
Who on earth gave you the right to make me feel this way?
I can't justify how every normal choice I'm never making
Was influenced by things you didn't say
Will you remember me? I hope you don't
All I want to be to you is just a ghost
I gave it all to you, so now you're bored
And I don't think you'll learn to love me if you don't
If you already don't
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12. |
CHRONIC
02:19
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No, I won't lie, I'm chronically online
A disease that spreads from the brain down the spine
An issue that some may blame on the time I was born
By myself watching Netflix again
Watching softcore romance and girls being friends
When will it be me? Not just a fantasy?
Wanna go somewhere else and be seen
What would you try to do if I didn't? (Thinking of being a runaway)
What would you even think if I did? (I guess there wasn't that much to say)
All of the awful things I could tell you...
Did you meet someone nice or half-dead?
And what if I told you the truth?
Would you turn right around and be gone?
It's not like I'm afraid to lose you
Just to keep you and not know your thoughts
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13. |
STARVED
03:59
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I wasn't looking for that much
But now I'm just starving for your touch
It's like anything and everything has caused me to feel
Pesky little thoughts I've snuffed as such,
But then I just acted on my hunch
All that I've hoped for will be realized or erased over time
Nothing you can do except sit there and cry
Or maybe get up and try
Get up and try
I wasn't looking for that much
But now it looks like I'm out of touch
I'm reaching out for something that has no hands out to catch me
My poor little heart can't take this much
But I'm here again, it's like a crutch
Whatever I wanted isn't here so why am I about to cry?
Why do such little things make me just wanna die?
And every day it goes on, I wonder who here has lied
And if you would lie
And maybe I lied
But baby, I'm gonna try
Things look good for you,
I'm starving for your touch and it's only you
I don't know why it needs to be, but look at me
Do you see a woman with her arms outreached?
Is she seen?
It's hard finding something that I can believe
So, baby, don't lie to me, don't lie to me
Or I'll cut it off real quick, gelding
I wasn't looking for that much
But now I'm just starving for your touch
It's like anything and everything has caused me to feel
Pesky little thoughts I've snuffed as such,
But then I just acted on my hunch
All that I've hoped for will be realized or erased over time
Erased over time
Erased over time
Erased over time
Erased over time
Erased over time
Erased over time
You're wasting your time
You're wasting your time
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